Hey girl, get smart, and I think you are and just needing a little support of what your instinct is telling you. Get yourself away from this doctor who has the knife waiting. You definately deserve, mentally and physically, to be able to try to birth normally through your vagina, not your stomach. Thousands of woman successfully birth after a Cesarian. Each Cesarian you have is higher risk than having a vaginal birth. Of course the recovery is harder too. Get a doula, or better a midwife if you can find one that will labor with you at home and bring you to the hospital with a big dilation. Try Dr. Carlos Rosenberg if you are in the central area as he is very supportive of natural birth after Cesarian. He works with several kupot cholim and also privately. Don't give in and you can do it! After you birth vaginally, you should write your doctor a letter and tell him why you left him.
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