22/6/2001 10:10
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נעמי
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מאת:
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עדית, אני במקרה מכירה את הבחורה שעליה כתבת...
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כותרת:
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...and I'll continue this in English, since I am too tired to think in Hebrew at the moment. I hope that's okay with you all.
I think it's very disrespectful to do what you just did. Pointing a finger at a specific person, and calling her birth story a horror story. How can you do that? This is HER story and HER baby. Yes, I'm also all for physiological births, but I would never ever put someone down and point a finger at them for NOT thinking the way I do. For some people pain is the worst enemy ever. The mere thought of having to go through labour without epidurals is their worst nightmare. Maybe all women wished that they could handle the pain in a natural way. Maybe they all can. But the thing is, they have a choice, and they take it. Does that make them bad? Does that turn their birth story into a horror story?!
So I'm planning to give births naturally - as naturally as is possible in a hospital environment (my hubby doesn't want a home birth, and I don't believe in going against the man I love when it comes to something as important as this). A natural dream, with a baby that isn't groggy from all the different medications. But what if something goes wrong during the birth? What if it's necessary ("chalila") to have a c-section, or even an induction of some sort? Should I then feel guilty for not having the birth of my dreams? Should I be stoned and punished for not "succeeding" in having a natural birth?
I'm now in week 39 and although I'm very calm and optimistic about my birth, and hope it will be exactly the way it is outlined in my mind and in my heart, I do take into consideration that there can be sudden changes.
The woman you pointed your finger at, is a human being. A human being with the same rights to make her own choices as you and I. So WE think that the ultimate way to give birth is the way that nature planned it, but does that give us the right to judge others? Is it their fault that this way (with all the medical interventions) is the most known way today in Israel? They don't all study issues that help them see the natural way as THE WAY. WE are the 'freaks". We are the ones who don't do things the way the others do, so please, I ask you NOT to judge her. She's a sweet girl and this was her way of giving birth to her beautiful daughter. That doesn't make her stupid or a bad mother or even ignorant. It's just her way. That's all.
I hope that you and the others understand my meaning. I don't point a finger at you either (for it would be as if I pointed a finger at myself). I believe in live and let live. Give birth and let others give birth. Each in her own way.
Girls, have a wonderful weekend and enjoy your pregnancy, make your own choices and I wish for you all (and myself) to indeed have the possibility to give birth the way we always wished we would.
Naomi
P.S. The fact that I know her, doesn't make me "take sides". It's just hard for me to see how easily you judge someone for having different opinions and for not being you.
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